I’ll say it one last time: I’m tired of zombies. Can we please come up with a monster a bit more creative than an undead human who feasts on the brains of living humans? Better yet, think of it this way: how do chickens see us? Do they design video games where you need heavy artillery to prevent the humans from stealing their legs and wings? No. Neither do cows, or pigs, or whatever the meat in the middle of a White Castle hamburger happens to be from. We need to stop.
Or, we could have some hormonal teenage female writer come up with a horrible love story between a zombie who’s so in love with this teenage girl he couldn’t bear to turn her into a zombie so they could live the undead life (oxymoron, no?) for eternity? Maybe call the series “Almost Twilight.” “Somewhat Close to Dawn” might be another good title. Just remember, if someone makes this movie (I’m looking at you Uwe Boll,) I at least want a creative mention in the title.
Dead Island is an island full of zombies. Be still my beating heart. The best thing about this game is you can co-op four players together and kill zombies like in… oh wait, they did this in Left 4 Dead. Dead Island isn’t left for dead, but it’s Left 4 Dead: Island Paradise.
Instead of me telling you all the little nuances about Dead Island, let’s just get to the brains and potatoes: It’s a heavy artillery version of Left 4 Dead. You and your friends have to survive, and it’s a bloodbath of zombie mess everywhere. You will not find more gore in a zombie game anywhere else.
I will say, all the little “nods” to the old zombie cliché’s and movies are a nice touch, but this reviewer is a bit tired of zombies.
Bottom Line: It’s not a bad game; it’s just not a good game.
|Graphics:||Great visuals – great granny there’s a butt-ton of gore to be had. The gore is shiny and not sparkly in the sunlight though, that’s always a bonus.||9|
|Storyline:||You and your friends land on an island. There are so many zombies that zombies are coming out of other zombies. The idea is to get off the island. Good luck. This review will self-destruct in 3…2…1:||7|
|Controls:||The worst part of the game other than the FREAKING ZOMBIES. Sometimes you’ll upgrade a weapon and the guy who you impaled un-spawns, taking your upgraded weapon with him. If they would only stay dead!||5|
|Replayability:||Because of the online factor and the co-op versions, this is a fun one to have with zombies in the house or when they come over for Thanksgiving to show you’re on their side.||8|
|Value:||For me? Not so great. For a zombie fan of old-school zombie stuff, this is a brain-dream come true.||7|
|Total:||36 out of 50
- Chris Tallant